Adventure?

This morning I was like, 

“WWAAHHHH MY BEST FRIEND REPLACED ME AFTER WE BROKE UP!!”

Then I was like,

“Oh wait. I don’t care…” 

^-^ 

Now I’m going to the rib shack to get some ribs!! 

Y’all live in NEPA? 

CALL 570869RIBS and ORDER SOME THAT SHIT! 

“Just keep doing this, the more they watch us the more Jimmy has time to steal their cash.”

(via theanimalblog)

Keeping it classy tumblr. 

(via snoopcatdoge)

I pee’d on a man’s hunting blind this morning. 

Bastard. 

Lots of things today.

Tj called me at 432 AM and this is how the conversation went. 

 Me -Sdnfiweofffgrrahhp. What?

 Tj - I just totaled my truck. Can you wake up your dad? 

 Me - WHAT!? ARE YOU OKAY.

 Tj - I think so. I can see my arm. I need your dad’s truck to pull me out. I have to go to work.

 Me- OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. How bad is it? Are you okay? Is it totaled? I’ll be right there.

 Tj - Okay. Bad. The bumper is in front of me in the field. I hit a pole. There were deer. I lost my tire. But I can feel my arm. 

 Me - Wait. What? Where is your tire? 

 Tj - Idk. It came off. I need your dad to pull me out. My arm hurts. 

 Me - Tj… He can’t pull you out if your truck no longer has a tire.

 Tj - Oh. I’m going to be late for work. Please come get me. 

What a fantastic morning. After FOUR hours waiting for cops/towtrucks/employers/parents/everyone on the hill to arrive, we finally got everything taken care of. Tj is okay, he’s really banged up and he scraped the piss out of his arm but all in all he’s okay considering he put his truck through a pole and into a field. Without a driver’s tire. 

Then we had amazing “I ALMOST DIED” sex. 

It was amazing. 

Also just bought the “How to Archer” book by archer sterling. Alex. Yeah. It’s real. 

theanimalblog:

Submitted by: iamciska

=[ 

twenty bucks says these men are British. 

(via lgbtlaughs)

llbwwb:

Fox and Kits #3 (by Jim McCree)

I SAW FOUR BABY FOXES LAST NIGHT AND THEY WERE ADORABLE. 

(via theanimalblog)

splinteryourspine:

what is a two way petting zoo?

you pet the animals

they pet you back

I think… that is illegal in the US. 

tumbler-nude:

Women with white whales

WHAT AQUARIUM ALLOWS THIS!?

(via splinteryourspine)

a woman’s nose is like a man’s ballsack. 

weak. 

angrylesbianmom:

THERE IS A HALF EATEN PICKLE IN MY BATHOOM I AM SO DONE WITH MY GHETTO ASS FAMILY

(via snoopcatdoge)

lindsayolohan:

happy sinko de mayo

(via snoopcatdoge)

shiphassailed:

“i have no problem with homosexuals my best friend is one” says the tumblr user, causing angels to descend from heaven playing gorgeous harps and drape them in garlands of flowers, proclaiming them the number one gay rights activist of all time, literally incapable of homophobia, infallible and the winner of all internet arguments until the end of time, filled with the light of pure social justice righteousness, and the next coming of jesus christ himself

(via lgbtlaughs)